Recently Chi seems to have developed some absurd inclination to flaunt his mental illness and totally irrational behaviour at people other than me.  He threw a big, ugly shit-stink for absolutely no reason at a close, long-term friend of mine/ours who stayed with us last Friday evening after doing the very same thing to another close, long-term friend of mine/ours who stayed with us a couple weeks earlier, and now he’s getting into it with the neighbours and our landlord.  

I’d love to soundtrack this post with Pink Floyd’s “Brain Damage” from their “Dark Side of the Moon” album, but the potential copyright infringement issue puts me off of it. Instead, listen while you read to “So Annoying”, a Panache track that we have no definite plans to record at this point.

Sunday night, August 12, 2012

Several months ago a woman apparently moved in with our next door neighbors.  She drives a dark red van that leaks a lot of fluids and often has trouble starting up.  She also has an annoying habit of parking anywhere she feels like and blocking everyone else from getting in or out of the driveway.  This has occurred several times when Chi has had to leave very early in the morning to get to his acting jobs.  He can’t be late or he will get fired.  Our neighbors are a Thai family that we have been on friendly terms with since we moved in about 3 ½ years ago.  The man is now totally disabled and in severely declining health.  The woman can speak at least some English and is supporting the whole house and doing everything to keep it functioning, just like me.  They have a cute little six year old daughter.

We spoke with the wife one day when the parking hassle had repeated often enough to become seriously bothersome.  Another annoying thing about it is that their house guest’s manners leave much to be desired.  I find it unpleasant, but for Chi, any petty slight to his towering ego is an occasion to fly into a hysterical control drama temper tantrum.  Anyway, the lady next door said that the other woman is staying with them temporarily to help out with the child and the disabled husband, and will be moving back to Thailand soon.  We offered to clear out the second parking space of ours that I have a bunch of crap piled in which I haven’t yet got around to making disappear, but she refused that offer.  I don’t know why, as that would have solved the problem as best I can tell.

The guest allegedly flew back to Thailand a few weeks ago, but has since returned, and the parking problems returned with her.  On Friday evening (August 10) Chi had a drum gig.  He got home a little after 11:00 PM and started unloading his drums and putting them under the house, and then came running upstairs to the back door shouting at me to come outside because the Woman with the Red Van had come back and was blocking the driveway.  Chi had to leave at 5:00 a.m. the next morning for a film job.  I was in the middle of taking something out of the oven and didn’t have shoes on, so was not in a position to be able to run out the door at that moment and defuse the situation.

I heard shouting and commotion, and just as I was getting my shoes on to to outside, Chi came in the house and said that she refused to move.  He was very agitated.  I followed him out downstairs and saw the van parked at the top of the driveway blocking everyone in, but the woman had apparently gone inside.  Chi insisted that I call the landlord and ask what to do, i.e., tow her or whether he would come over to help settle the matter.  I called his cell phone and he did not answer.  It was just after 11:30 PM and I figured he was asleep.

We went back downstairs again and I heard voices from the neighbors’ side of the duplex we share, and then the woman came back out and after she and Chi exchanged some heated words in broken English, she got in her van and made her way slowly down the steep, narrow driveway.  From the words they exchanged, she is apparently aware that Chi has a drug problem.  This time, however, he was not on drugs!  At any rate, Chi was able to get to his film job the next day without any further hassle.

The landlord and I spoke the next day and I gave a brief summary of events.  He said he didn’t know about the houseguest next door, and would check on it later that day.  On Sunday, Chi asked me what had happened, as if he was expecting that the landlord was going to report back to me about what had occurred when he talked to the neighbors.  I said I had no idea what had come of it.  He started going on about the big drama he was planning on making of it.  I just rolled my eyes and said he was on his own with that.

The rest of the day proceeded peacefully, and we even managed to get through a spectacularly wonderful dinner with no fuss…until the Woman with the Red Van came back.  This time she parked in the next door neighbours’ spot where she wasn’t blocking anything.  I didn’t even hear her pull up, but Chi apparently did and went ballistic.  He ran downstairs and then came back in and announced that he had blocked her in, and demanded that I call the landlord.  It was going on 11 PM.  He’s really big on disturbing other people late at night with his drug-fueled trauma drama (This has been going on for as long as I can remember).  I refused, but said that he could if he wanted to.  He said to dial for him.  I said no, and to get his own phone and place the call himself.  I then read the landlord’s home number to him.  Apparently no one picked up.

He must be starting to get the idea that such puerile histrionics do not engage me, and apparently decided to try his luck with the neighbors, saying in an obnoxious, childish, sing-song, taunting voice (in English), “I’m going to fight the neighbors!”  Fucking brilliant!  Obviously the person causing the problem doesn’t give a shit, so he’s going to go terrorize the disabled man and small child and take it out on them.  What. A. Douche!  At this point all he was doing was giving an extensive demonstration of what a severe and pathetic head case he is, both to our neighbors and to our landlord, and if somebody calls 911, LAPD will witness the same spectacle, which will significantly strengthen my case for having him deported and his visa shit-canned.  I next heard him pounding on the neighbors’ door and yelling.  Apparently no one answered.  Gee, I wonder why?

He came back into our house, then went into my office, got into my handbag and took my key to the truck, so I won’t be able to move it in case anyone decides to have it towed, which they would be perfectly in their right to do.  I ignored the hysterical child and carried on with clearing the table and washing the large pile of dishes since I had no interest in waking up to a massive ant attack the next morning (Our place is absolutely overrun with ants).  He tried the landlord again and apparently this time someone picked up because I heard him start to talk.  He then came into the kitchen and tried to hand the phone off to me, but I refused to do his bidding.  He said into the phone, “I don’t know why, but my wife does not want to talk with you.”  Cute.  He went back to the phone call and apologized that his English still sucks, and then told me it was the landlord’s wife and urged me again to speak with her.

I reluctantly took the phone this time and briefly recounted the history of the problem and apologized for my husband insisting on making a stink about what was presently a total non-issue at this time of night.  She apologized for not picking up the phone earlier because she thought it was an intruder.  I thought, “Your intuition is spot-on!”.  She said that it could not be handled right then (Duh!), but they would take care of it as soon as possible.  I thanked her and apologized again and we hung up.

He then demanded that I call his management service and cancel him out of his acting job the next day, which of course I refused to do.  He’s tried this infantile schtick many times before to no avail.  I just said “Whatever.  Plan on moving back to Japan since I am going to divorce you and have you deported.”

In an apparently desperate attempt to engage me one final time in this jackassery, at 11:44 PM he declared that he was going to start drinking gin again after being off hard alcohol since Memorial Day.  I really don’t give a fuck.  At this point, I am simply collecting evidence to make my case as to why he should not be allowed to stay in this country and why I should not be legally obligated to continue supporting him.  I’ll let him hang himself since that is what he seems to specialize in doing.  Less bad karma for me that way.  I heard him banging around in the kitchen making noise with the big glass bottle.

I was able to slip outside and get photos of the positions the vehicles were in.  The burgundy van was parked in a regular parking place not blocking anyone, and his/our truck was blocking the entire driveway to such an extent that I wouldn’t have even been able to get out with my scooter.  That will no doubt play really well for whoever encounters this sad scenario tomorrow morning or whenever.

At 12:45 a.m. I heard voices outside and someone appeared with a strong, official-looking flashlight downstairs just below my office window at the corner of the building next to the top of the driveway where Chi had left our truck parked, and a few seconds later, footsteps coming up the stairs and then someone started banging on our door shouting, “Police!”  I stayed right where I was writing this journal and decided to let Chi handle it since he had caused the whole mess.  He answered the door, went downstairs and moved the truck, and then came into my office and returned my key to the truck to me.  I trust there will be a report about this incident.  More “hard evidence” to bolster my position. What-the-fuck-ever…..

The next morning he got up and drove off to his TV job at 6:00 a.m. and I realized that I had been very lucky to have not been dragged deeper into his ego hissy last night.  I wonder if maybe he is finally starting to get the point that when I shut down and refuse to aid and abet him with whatever shit-stink he is throwing, “no” means “no”, no matter how much he abuses me.  Or perhaps he realized what a wretched position he has put himself into now that there is a police report showing him parked illegally blocking everyone in, and the other person parked in a regular, non-obstructive space.  He’s going to have a very interesting time trying to defend himself for that one, and maybe he is aware that he will need my help now more than ever.  I am not feeling very inclined to be helpful.

This recent bender he’s been on with destroying important relationships reminds me of when I first met him and was nonplussed at how he kept telling me about all these friends he had that he “fought with” and they were no longer in contact.  Now I know the reason why.  Big. Red. Flag.  This just all goes to show that there is no having a good day as long as Chi is around to fuck it up.

Ironically enough, here is my horoscope for that day, or the day it became while I was up late waiting for this hassle to die down sufficiently for there to be any point in trying to go to bed:

Monday, August 13, 2012
By Rick Levine
A relationship with a powerful person may come to a head today as clashing points of view require resolution. However, a direct confrontation won’t produce a winner, so avoid locking horns with anyone to prevent unnecessary drama. Instead of arguing about who is right and who is wrong, explore common ground so you can accomplish more than either of you could on your own.

On Friday afternoon (before the incident when he came home that evening), I had called the band leader of the group Chi was playing drums with that evening to confirm the time to load in for the gig, and the leader remarked on what a “saint” Chi is (yes, he really said “saint”!), both as a great musician and as a person.  Given Chi’s behaviour for as long as I have known him, I can never decide whether to laugh or cry when that happens, and it happens fairly often….