The agonizing situation persisted with the tug-of-war of priorities between my need to have Chi out of my house and out of my immediate personal life, and the big-picture need to get as much of our vast repertoire recorded at broadcast quality; with the Sword of Damocles hanging over my head as to whether the Hawaii thing would actually come through, or if Chi’s criminal record for abusing me would send that sword crashing down on my head as my financial situation got more dire by the day thanks to Chi’s continued occupation of my balance sheet and concurrent failure to secure any sustainable employment.  (more…)

As I mentally distance myself more and more from the toxic marriage and consciously project the reality of ending it, I explore the topic of my relationship to music sans Chi.   (more…)

The strong, stable creative phase that Chi had been in since around May 2013 was still ongoing, and this put me in the untenable position of being trapped between wanting to complete the process of preserving the creative output that we had produced up until now while developing and recording the new material he was continuously composing; and wondering how much more damage and stress I could withstand. Is this even worth doing at all, given that I am trying to do it with the human equivalent of antimatter?  (more…)

I finally “get it”… (more…)

I was still at the steep end of the infinitely frustrating, crazymaking learning curve trying to figure out audio engineering and then added insult to injury with another maddening ordeal of learning how to do drum programming while Chi kept on inundating me with more new and increasingly complex music he was composing. This was also the point where it became clear that there was a vitally important missing link that would enable me to overcome some major technical issues that were making progress unnecessarily difficult.  (more…)

Chi has been behaving exceptionally well recently.  There are occasional flare-ups, but they are brief and resolve quickly. Nevertheless, he still has to go, and this is why…
(more…)

After a decade of no viable employment for Chi and I/we were getting dangerously close to the edge of ending up homeless and bankrupt, something sustainable finally came up!  (more…)

Chi got another opportunity to shoot for a job as a musician playing on cruise ships, and this is how it went this time….  (more…)

The creative kick Chi had been on since spring continued through the summer, and the music he was composing was a distinct departure from what we have been doing to date. I was very excited about it, and while the ordeal of trying to figure out audio engineering on my own so we could record it was driving me to the edge of genuine madness as was still having him here in the house, I was game to keep going.  (more…)

On putting off the overwhelmingly tedious hassle of doing our taxes.  (more…)